Bloggers train

Importance of Self, in love and all else.

There are many kinds of love in this world. Some can be the selfless sort of love that you have for your parents and your kids, some the lustful kind-of love, a greedy love, a conditional form of love and so on and so forth. The biggest of all these is the love for one self.

No matter how much people despise you, no matter how much people try to bring you down, unless you dont have a love for yourself, nobody can do anything to you. You are exactly who you think you are. You are as big a success as is your love for yourself.

We are always on the lookout out for the someone special but what we forget is that we are looking for something outside of us while that one thing should have been coming out from us. This love is everlasting and unconditional and will never change for any reason.

I knew a girl who while in college was a confident, opinionated and a heartthrob to a few young men. She was wanted for her class and sass. All this was because she loved her self so much. Her self love emanated to the outside world and people in turn had fallen in love with her. Soon after college she got married and was made to stay at home for the sake of her kids and family. She soon ended up being a mere mom to her kids and all her charm and self confidence just disappeared overnight. She ended up being a remorseful wife and was ending up becoming an unhappy witch. The only change that ever happened was that she now felt useless. She stopped loving herself and when this happened, the world stopped loving her back.

Well thanks to a bloggers group called #unapologeticgirlz and their first prompt which made me realize what was happening to me and my life. I am really unhappy in this phase of stay at home, not because I don’t enjoy spending quality time with my kids but because I have lost a reason to get up and get dressed and go somewhere each day. I have lost the love I always had for myself. Life turned out to be too lethargic for my liking I guess.

I make a promise to myself of this women’s day to love myself more and more with each passing day. Song of myself written by American Walt Whitman is an inspiration to all of us. He celebrates himself through the song and is entirely about I, me and myself. A small excerpt from the song goes like this
‘I celebrate myself,
And what I assume you shall assume,
For every atom belonging to me as good belongs to you.’

It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 30 other bloggers are celebrating Women’s Day with a twist.
I thank Charu Sareen who blogs at https://themomsagas.com for introducing me. She is an amazing mom and do check out her blog.

I would also take the opportunity to introduce Amritha Srinath who blogs at http://www.themummastartup.com. She has a great blog there, so please go check it out.

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Bloggers train

Fantasies need empowering too!

She Is A Fantasy
Sweet As A Harmony
No One Knows She’s A Mystery
Fills Your Heart With Ecstasy

This is a famous Tamil son from the movie kakha kakha. If you are all this then it’s a fact that you are a woman who has been empowered.

You have a job, a support system is in place for you while you are at work, and after work all you do is spend quality time with your kids, then I must tell you that you have an empowered life.

But have any of us thought about those people who make life so much easier for you, about what they must be going through and what is their situation at home?

I have heard people say, they hardly cook anything much so what work she has at home. They have a small house, so what cleaning they have. But have you ever thought how she manages to send four kids to school, does she wash clothes with her hands or does she have a washing machine?

It’s time we women become more considerate, try to understand and support our help at home so that even they enjoy an empowerment in their lives.

*⃣Let her have some rest at your house so that she can go back anf work for her family.
*⃣Let her take back a few goodies from your place, because she could never afford those for her kids.
*⃣Give her a day off when you have one so she could spend some quality time with her family.

*⃣Don’t hesitate to pay her salary when she asks you for it, it’s because she needs it badly that she asked you in the first place.
*⃣Be kind to her with your words and your actions, try not hurt her feelings with your actions.
*⃣Show genuine interest in her life, treat her like a sister or a family member. If not anything she runs your house while you are away.

It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 30 other bloggers are celebrating Women’s Day with a twist hosted by @mylittlemuffin_mom, @mommyvoyage And @themomsagas and sponsored by @kaurageousyou .

I thank Charu Sareen who blogs at https://themomsagas.com for introducing me. She is an amazing mom and do check out her blog.

I would also take the opportunity to introduce Amritha Srinath who blogs at http://www.themummastartup.com. She has a great blog there, so please go check it out.

#unapologeticgirlz

Bloggers train

Daughter, you are the most beautiful girl in the whole wide world.

I woke up like this
We flawless, ladies tell ’em
Say I, look so good tonight
God damn, God damn
Say I, look so good tonight

These are the lyrics of Flawless by Beyonce! This song is all about how girls are taught to hate their own bodies from a very young age.

As a girl grows up, she is under a lot of peer pressure where she is expected to have a flat stomach and a size zero. An extra ounce of flesh would make her stand out in the crowd of peers!

But is this right? As parents we have a certain responsibility of making our children understand that nothing depends on how you look. We often forget to teach our kids that beauty is just skin deep.

How often have we tried to talk to our daughters and make them feel beautiful, appreciate their looks, encourage them to turn towards a healthy lifestyle. Kids expect us to constantly approve of them, well because it’s just their human nature to feel approved of.

Teach your daughters to love themselves.

Teach your daughters to stand up for themselves.

Teach your daughters self respect.

Teach your daughters that they become a better person because of their actions and not because of their looks.

Indulge and spend time on you kids, because they are the future. They need to be nurtured and cherished so that they are able to grow up to be better human beings.

”There is nothing more rare, nor more beautiful, than a woman being unapologetically herself; comfortable in her perfect imperfection. To me, that is the true essence of beauty.” “The human body is the best work of art.” “Women who love themselves are threatening.” said someone!

My friend had a daughter, she went through a lot of peer pressure for being on the plump side. This kid was distraught and starved herself for days. Slowly she started losing weight. Initially it was all about looking good but soon it turned into something more dangerous. It became an eating disorder, slowly she was slipping away into depression. Her parents were far too busy with work to notice that their daughter was slowly getting wasted in life. They thought it was a teenager thing and the phase will pass soon. It did pass for the parents, because this kid committed suicide. A beautiful life wasted over self loathing. Only then did her parents realize in what situation their daughter must have been in and all the pain she must have gone through.

It’s not about just raising kids, it’s more about raising sensible kids who know what their priorities are and how not to indulge in meagre things in life.

In order to teach your daughters, you have to first love your own body and be comfortable in your own skin. No point in hating your flabs and your heavy bossoms and then asking your daughter to love herself. First set an example to your daughter and then try to teach her values.

Remember you are beautiful no matter what your bra size is, no matter how big your buttocks are, no matter how huge you are. All that matters is the person you have become in the long run! And only with appreciation from within and acceptance of who you are would bring you joy and happiness in the long run.

It brings me immense pleasure to share that I, along with 30 other bloggers are celebrating Women’s Day with a twist hosted by @mylittlemuffin_mom, @mommyvoyage And @themomsagas and sponsored by @kaurageousyou .

I thank Charu Sareen who blogs at https://themomsagas.com for introducing me. She is an amazing mom and do check out her blog.

I would also take the opportunity to introduce Amritha Srinath who blogs at http://www.themummastartup.com. She has a great blog there, so please go check it out.

#unapologeticgirlz

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Dubai, the city I grew to love!

I grew up in Dubai. My childhood revolved around the beaches and the parks of Dubai. I loved the corniche there, the Abra was an all time favorite. Shawarma was my first love and sharjah shakes used to fill me up!

I lived in the city of Dubai way before it got all its grandeur and got the world’s tallest building as another feather in its cap of achievements. Wild wadi was the biggest theme park while I was there and Atlantis never existed then!

Journey between the emirates was our eid holiday routine, sometimes to the hot water springs of Al Ain, sometimes to the hills of Ras Al Khaimah. Hatta was a rare treat while I had never heard of Jabal Jais then, it is some place that all Dubai peeps go to for weekends.

Desert safari was a big deal, well I guess not any more. Dubai got The Pointe now and has its very own man made lake. Gone are the days when options were limited in Dubai. You name it and you find it in Dubai.

The very hailstones to our sand storms, the sand getting into your eyes and hurting you bad, to learning that camels have an extra layer of protection on their eyes to protect them from the storms. I guess I knew more about all the emirates of UAE rather than all the states of India.

Schools taught me Arabic, I can proudly say that I can read and write Arabic though I may never understand anything I read or write. It’s the most beautiful language I came across, because it’s so different yet so twisted in its own ways.

Sometimes I wonder, do I know the UAE national anthem better than the Indian anthem. I get goosebumps when I hear UAE national anthem everytime  because that was what was instilled in my blood since I was a toddler.

Though through all this there were times when Dubai hurt me, caused me pain and brought tears to my eyes. The day I flew out of Dubai I cried like a baby for the entire duration of the flight. Dubai might have bid me adieu but it will always be a part of me and my upbringing. I really wish that someday I get to take back my kids to the city I love!

Dubai would always be my dream city! The city I came to love and cherish over the years. From having my first crush to many more firsts that I ever had. Any city I would love to go back to and start fresh would me my Dubai!

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Folic Acid to keep frolic always!

The birth of a baby is one occasion that brings about immense joy and happiness to the entire family. We do believe that looks are only skin deep, but God forbid something like this to happen to anyone, imagine seeing for the first time your bundle of joy, delivered as a blessing directly from the hands of God to be a not so perfect baby with a cleft lip or a cleft palate.

Imagine the shock or the pain that one as a new mom or a dad will go through. We will love our baby no matter what but will the society treat them the same way? Today with developments in medical industry the number of such cases have come down but still there are about 4400 such cases being recorded in the United States alone each year.

So what exactly is a cleft lip or palate?Cleft lip is a physical split or separation of the two sides of the upper lip and appears as a narrow opening or gap in the skin of the upper lip. Cleft palate is a split or opening in the roof of the mouth. Children suffering from this may have difficulties in speaking and eating depending on the intensity of the defect.

I personally knew someone who carried a baby to full term knowing that the baby had a severe case of cleft lip and cleft palate. The doctors had diagnosed this during the fifth month ultrasound scan, but by then it was too late to do anything. It was so severe that doctors had told her that the baby might never talk in its entire life. She spent the rest of her pregnancy crying and praying for a miracle to happen. And finally she ended up giving birth to a stillborn baby. I saw her suffer and the pain she went through was undefined. Atleast her pain ended there, had the baby been born alive, it would have been the start of another series of pain for both her and her baby.

Did you know that this is preventable to a certain extent though it is genetic and environmental based. Yes you heard it right! With the help of frolic acid, which is a form of vitamin B found in folate,easily available as a vitamin tablet or naturally available in green leafy vegetables and citrus fruits.

Doctors will recommend that you start taking folic acid every day for at least a month before you become pregnant, and every day while you are pregnant. However, it is also recommended that all women of childbearing age or those planning to have a baby, take folic acid every day.

Various risks can be reduced by taking folic acid before and during pregnancy, these are mentioned below:

Cleft lip and palate
Premature birth
Low birth weight
Miscarriage
Poor growth in the womb
Pre-eclampsia

Lack of sufficient quantities of folic acid in your body, your baby’s neural tube may not close correctly and they could develop health problems called neural tube defects. These include:

Spina bifida: incomplete development of the spinal cord or the vertebrae
Anencephaly: incomplete development of major parts of the brain

The recommended dose of folic acid per day in adults is 400mcg. Start taking these from today if you are planning on having babies or start a family, trying to concieve or are in various stages of your pregnancy.

I did take them from three months before I became pregnant through my entire pregnancy period. I have personally recommended folic acid tablets to all my friends who are trying to start a family. Won’t you join in with me and others trying to fight off cleft lip by taking folic acid tablets to give your baby a better start to life?

Anamaya Indo pacific is an organization that is working towards making India free from several birth defects using preventable methods that are really cheap and affordable rates.
Check out their website on http://anamayaindopacific.org/ for more details and follow them on facebook for regular updates https://www.facebook.com/Anamayaindopacific

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Booby and baby!

Today while trying to put my kids to sleep, my son who was very playful was lying on my chest. I thought he was trying to get some sleep but then I got bitten on my chest by him. That’s when I realized how many such bites I have escaped from. I never had to experience babies who cling onto my breast of pulling at my neckline asking for dudu. My kids have rarely even touched my boobs.

I have hardly breastfed my kids directly from the boobs. They were preterm and their sucking capacity was low more over being twins, it was like me staying up the entire day trying to feed both of them directly. from the breasts. That was one reason I was more convenient with pumping.

From day one I have always had a pump accompanying me at all times. Initially I was pumping every two hours. Once my supply got better and more established I moved on to pumping every three hours.

Initially I used a manual hand pump, I really can’t imagine how I did it with it after moving on to Medella’s electric pump. Pumping became way more easier with the electric pump, also I managed to save a lot of time. This was my biggest task each day because I was determined to exclusively give only breastmilk for my babies until they were six months, not that I am against formula. Now I do feed my kids formula feeds while we go out.

Sometimes when milk supply was low I used to pump like a crazy woman, only because I felt guilty for delivering them at 32 weeks and feeding them breastmilk was my way to forgive myself and find solace. There were days when I cried while pumping because I did not produce sufficient milk for both my children.

Pumping was ideally not meant to hurt. But beyond a certain stage pumping cause your breasts to hurt like crazy. Pumping has made my nipples grow horizontally. Nobody knows all these pains, that one has to endure unless they have pumped.

To top it all off, friends and other moms who know that I don’t feed my kids directly say that Im lucky because I don’t have to endure bites and bruises from the little monsters sucking at the breasts all day long. When I hear them describe their experiences, I have felt relieved at times that I’m pumping for good.

Well now almost after 5 months of weaning them from breastmilk, I feel like I have missed out on that special bond that we would have shared had we been breastfeeding. It’s something so special that only a mom and her baby gets to share. Nothing or no-one can even come in between them.

Those of you who chose to feed your kids, a big hats off to you and to those of you who decided against it, you are still an awesome mom. Kudos to all moms.

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Take a stand!

Taking a stand for yourself is easier said than done. So many times life throws you into situations where you can’t stand up for your opinions. It’s like these opinions don’t matter at all.

It’s high time I realized that I take matters into my own hands. My opinions are what I think about and what I strongly believe in. I might not be as experienced as you are but that doesn’t make my decision any less important than yours.

Parenting is one such place where you have to make sure that your opinions matter because it’s your kid who is at stake here. Maybe by suppressing your opinion which might have come from the motherly gut feeling within you, you might put your own child on jeopardy.

I’m not saying your opinions will always be right but then it has a touch of instinct to it which makes it almost right. Do your study on the topic beforehand, so that you don’t seem less knowledgable about the topic.

Being married, slight changes how our opinions are voiced. Here both partners have equal rights to their share of opinions. Finally the decisions won’t be from one particular party, instead it would be the joint decision made from the opinions of both parties.

Make your opinions matter, put across your validating points, argue for what you feel is right and finally in the end, make your opinions count. It’s all within you and your tongue is your aid. Make use of it and win this battle for your baby. Atleast in the end you tried to make it happen.

Do it a few times and it will soon become a habit. Take your stand and have no regrets.